Congrats To Theo Epstein, But The Wrong Jew Got The Cubs GM Job

Theo Epstein is on his way to the Friendly Confines Of Wrigley Field as the new Chicago Cubs  General Manager.  Here’s the report from Comcast Sports Network Chicago:

Despite the valiant effort of the Mark E For Cubs GM group on Facebook and  some good old fashioned Chicago-style arm bending, Mr. Epstein will be taking over the Big Office at 1060 West Addison soon and I’ll be sitting in the cheap seats if I’m lucky.

My being passed over for the Cubs GM job makes me sad, and therefore I wanted to remind people that should anything fatal happen to me, I hope to be left for eternity in one of the special Cubs caskets from the fine people at Eternal Image.  Those who are left to take care of my final details can choose either the casket or urn.  Photos of both are below for your reference.

Should you decide to use the urn, you can scatter my ashes onto Wrigley Field, but you have to do it at the end of the game and on the warning track near the bullpens.  Evidently the Ground Crew keeps an eye out for any ashes that might get on the field because they kill the grass.

I certainly with Mr. Epstein the ultimate success in his new job, but I remain bummed beyond belief that Tom Ricketts didn’t even call to talk with me about the job.  He and the people at WGN Radio who won’t let me broadcast part of a Cubs game are on my official Stink Eye List.

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